Modern India poses a lot of parenting challenges for the parents. India always boasted about its strong family bonding and stable families unlike the West. However, the situation is slowly changing in India too. Indian families too are getting more and more unstable. The concept of joint families have almost died out, marriages are becoming a challenge too. Divorce rate is increasing rapidly not only in cities but also in rural India. As if these were not enough the influence of the media on the children is pretty severe. Children are exposed to too much of violence through the media and the internet. Morality level is subsiding drastically in all the regions. All these make parenting in India a huge challenge than ever before.

Children are also under more pressure in terms of peer competition in schools and colleges. Teenagers need to be on their guards to keep themselves safe from the antisocial elements.

If you would like to be a good parent, the best way to start is by trying to understand their needs. Do not expect your children to hang on to every word you say because that is what you did with your parents. Times have changed and learn to accept that change. You need to be a friend to your children before you can be a good parent. Only when you relate to them at their level they will open up to you. If you are “Do what I say because I say so” kind of parent, you are most likely to distance your children. These days, children are more discerning for their age. They have many questions and try to answer their questions patiently. They look for answers that are based on reason and not just on tradition and religion. So feed their scientific mind with reason. If you learn to give your children a valid reason for why they should do something or why they should not do something. When we take this approach, we are very likely to win them and make them do the right things in their life.

Never start an ego war with your children. This is one of the problematic areas parents would never like to address. You must realize that teenagers do not like to take advice from their parents. Often parents get frustrated because their teenage kids do not listen to them. This ends up in an ego war between the parents and their teenage kids. This is a very crucial period of your life. You must make sure to be as close as possible to your teenager not as someone that will be telling them what to do but to listen to them and their anxieties of life. Let them talk and reduce your advice. Let them ask for help; just let them know that you are there to help them if they need your help. Teenagers would like to be independent. So given them the space they need and they will respect you for that.

You know that is such good practical advice.

We really do not understand the intense pressures that kids are facing. You can't remove the pressures you can simply support and help them deal as successfully as possible.

You know I look back and can remember always trying so hard to approach various situations with the kids calmly etc but most of the time when they were teenagers it freaks you right out.

Because your heart and love for them are involved you panic and act emotionally rather than logically and supportive way.

I always remember when things had calmed down - taking the time to sit with them and just explain that because I love them my fears for their safety and future just send me a little troppo and I am sorry if I didn't handle it well.

I am glad my kids still love their wacko mum.

If only we can get it right!!!!

That is right, parents should understand their children. They need more of our guidance and support when they become teenager. We have to communicate with them constantly. Making friends with their friends could be a good idea, right? Anyway, just try to understand them and you'll eventually gain their trust.