My grandmother just passed away and I still can't believe it. I was checking on her one minute and her breathing was pretty irregular, so I went to call the nurse. I got back by her side again, and she wasn't breathing. I kept checking and checking and checking.. thinking that maybe I could be wrong. I was right. I'm in shock right now. My main emotion is relief because I'm so glad all her pain is over, but I'm also so afraid of living without her. She's always been my rock, my comfort.. she just gets me and she accepts me for whoever I am, no matter what I do. I'm not sure where she is right now, but I love her so much and I'm so glad she's not suffering anymore. I can't believe it really just happened.

I'm not ready to let go, so they're not going to come pick her up for a few hours.. I just need some time to say goodbye and get used to the thought of being without her.

RIP Priscilla Brydahl December 13th, 2009 11:50pm

I love you so much grandma and I will continue to make you proud. I know you'll always be with me!

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-Brittany Brydahl

Brittany, I am so sorry to hear that. My prayers and wishes are
with you at this difficult time.
-F

I am sorry to hear that Brittany

Thank you Farce and smoothvibes. It really means a lot. I'm doing much better than I ever thought I could. I am just so glad she's no longer in pain.. the house feels peaceful, but then I miss her at the same time. She was such an amazing lady, and I know she was ready to go, so that's made it a lot easier on me. There's so many things to get done now, but I know it will all work out. I am so motivated to continue to make her proud.

I feel so lucky to have so many people in my life that support me. Without all the support, I'm not sure how I'd be doing right now.

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-Brittany Brydahl

Sorry to hear about your grandmother Brittany, hope you and your family get through this difficult time in life.

Thanks Harprett (I hope I'm spelling that right!!) It means a lot. Hope all is well with you.

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-Brittany Brydahl

Brittany, Time heals most wounds, My grandmother passed away last year
around this time. I was pretty attached to her. So I can understand how
you must be feeling. Be strong.

regards
-F

I'm sorry to hear about that Farce. Who knows, maybe they'll meet each other

__________________
-Brittany Brydahl

Sorry to hear about your grandma's demise. May her soul rest in peace! I pray to God to give you the mental strength to bear the loss of some one so dear to you!!

I'm doing surprisingly well. I'm just trying to stay distracted and busy most of the time. I feel mostly like I'm floating, just kind of out of it. I also notice that I'm sleeping a lot more than normal. Thanks for commenting

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-Brittany Brydahl

My condolences Brittany. My prayers are with you as well. I hope that you will find the strength to go through this time and take some comfort in the fact that your grandma loved you so much while she was alive. I am quite certain that she's still around to look after you, we never really die and disappear. Take care and be strong - you are still loved.

I really do feel like she's still here with me and I can't wait to get her ashes back.. not to sound weird, but I can't wait to have her home again.. even though I know she's here whether or not her ashes are. I guess I just need something physical to talk to when I'm upset or scared. I have this new strength and motivation to do well. I just want to continue to make her proud. I finally feel like I can work a real job again, which is major for me, because of my anxiety. I really hope I get a job soon

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-Brittany Brydahl

That's great Brittany - I am also trying to decide whether or not I will be going back to working at an office again, working from home is good but still pays less than what I would make at a ''real job'', hehe. But the thought of having to deal with a bunch of people on a daily basis is already killing me. I am glad you have a new motivation and you actually feel good about it - always remember, you can do anything you put your mind into (gotta remind that one to myself every day!)

I am sorry to hear about your loss. My prayer is that you will find new strength each day. I am sure that whatever you decide to do will make your grandmother proud.

Thinking about working as a cashier is freaking me out. A part of me is excited and then another part is freaking me out. I'm so worried about being around people again. I'm still trying to figure out exactly why I was having panic attacks while working at Comcast. I'm sure it's because there was so much I had to know and it was just becoming too much. Plus, I was working 40 hours/week, which I'd never done before. I was a cashier for 2 months, but I was at a little store, not a major one. I'm nervous to have to deal with selling things that I have to ID for etc. But, it's probably just my anxiety acting up- I'm sure.

I feel really lonely lately, because whenever I try to talk to people about how I'm feeling, they just don't get it. I hate when people tell me "Well, you HAVE to work." Sure, I realize that, but how is that going to help me feel any better about it? It just ads to the pressure and bums me out, because I don't want to work around people.

Thank you I know things will get easier with time..

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-Brittany Brydahl

God help you through these difficult times Brittany. You've had a lot to deal with, and now missing your grandma is hard, too.

My husband's grandma passed away this November, she was a wonderful lady, and we all loved her. She was ready to go - had everything ready, even wrote a list of whom she wanted her things to go to. It is hard to drive by where she lived and know that there is no longer a reason to take that turn...